By Dawn Quesnel, CPCC ~ Coach DQ
A question I hear often is:"How do I stay motivated once I've set my goals and planned out the steps to achieve them?"
It’s especially common around the New Year when people are setting fresh goals. The excitement of planning is great—but how do you keep that fire alive once it fades?
Understanding What Drives You
Think about what motivates you to make a purchase. Is it the price, style, or functionality? Or is it about how that item will improve your life? Are your decisions driven by logic or emotion?
For example, have you ever bought something you didn’t love at first but knew would be good for you? We’ve all been there, right?
Once we meet our basic needs—food, shelter, and clothing—our decisions are shaped by six core psychological needs:
Certainty – The need for stability and security
Uncertainty/Surprise – The need for variety and excitement
Significance – The need to feel important and valued
Contribution – The need to give and make an impact
Love/Acceptance – The need for connection and belonging
Personal Growth – The need to evolve and improve
These drivers influence everything we do—including the goals we set.
The Emotional “Buy-In” for Your Goals
Think about why you buy something like a stylish pair of shoes. Maybe they’re a splurge, but you justify the cost because they add value to your life. They fit into your personal plan—whether consciously or not.
The same principle applies to your goals. Writing them down is the first step, but if they don’t resonate with you emotionally, staying committed will be tough. It’s like trying to convince yourself to wear shoes you don’t like—they just don’t fit.
The goals you truly own are the ones that align with your core psychological needs. When they feel right, motivation comes naturally.
Letting Go of Goals That Don’t Fit
If a goal doesn’t resonate with you, it might feel disconnected or irrelevant. And that’s okay! You don’t have to force it. Instead, consider passing it on or reshaping it into something that feels more aligned with your needs. You can’t fully commit to a goal that doesn’t feel like yours.
A Simple Exercise to Strengthen Your Commitment
For each goal you set, identify the emotional “handle”—the leverage that makes you want to achieve it.
What feeling does this goal give you?
Does it fulfill a need for accomplishment, growth, or belonging?
Is it a must-have for your life?
Write it down. If the goal truly excites you and connects with your core needs, then you’ve found your motivation. When you own your goals emotionally, following through becomes effortless.
Ready to take action? Download my free Goal-Setting Worksheet here: https://www.coachdq.com/about (scroll down to the freebies!).
Make it a great one!
Hugs to you,
DQ
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